A guide to surviving malls, based on an afternoon in SM Mall of Asia, Manila

Like me, you think you are used to malls, indulging in therapy window shopping and even more shocking actual shopping for hours.  Or maybe you just detest shopping, and unfortunately I cannot relate. Whether a destination or a living hell, a mall tests your surviving skills.

When someone at work suggested I visit this landmark of consumerism, SM Mall of Asia , in the promise of great food and halo halo, I easily got honey trapped. Here are the lessons learned from that Sunday casual 3h visit.

1-It is always useful to find something to get, to pretext a visit to the mall and justify your guilty conscience. For example, I had to get gifts for family and friends, and wanted to taste the famous halo halo from Razon's. 

 2-Get an idea of the mall layout to get a vague sense of direction and size. When it is famous for being one of the 10 biggest malls in the world, it is best to prepare mentally.

3-Schedule your visit wisely. It may be to avoid traffic, rush hours at the food court, or to grab special sales, or to catch the sunset on the bay. Arriving the mall at noon like me was useful in finding shops empty and getting to browse without a crowd. However it was impossible to grab a drink or a bite until 3PM.

4-Find an information booth to grab a map of the amusement park facilities. If you are a planner, you can print it home and even mark down the shops you need to visit. If you are like me, you end up queuing for the fancy touchscreen maps and wandering thrice though the same places.
5-Localize the bathrooms. They are a good source of tissue and a venue for interesting happenings. I saw 2 ladies completely soaping up their faces to have a proper face wash in the bathroom, no doubt after participating in a costumed parade, monopolizing the sink, while dozens of women were queuing for the toilet and waiting to wash their hands.
6-Don't forget to indulge in pampering. Every mall I visited so far in Manila (Greenbelt, Glorietta, The Landmark) actually had their layout smartly organized by activity: shopping for clothes, books, shoes, luggage, electronics; food courts; pampering (massage, nails, cosmetics); cinemas;ice rinks; There is also always an area to drop the kids off before doing errands.


Bonus - Stop for a drink and watch the show. There is always some entertainment in malls: fashion shows, product placements, etc...It is a good opportunity to people watch and gossip, or try to learn the local body language and customs. Besides, one needs to hydrate and rest, while missing the comfort of your own bed.

Before you add up your bills* and face the harsh reality, there is always a poolside doze

Poolside

*if you had a shopping list, good for you. You probably bought more than expected anyway. It is not on the survival guide because it never worked on me.

Mabuhay!!! a safe landing in terra incognita

It was hinted more than 6 months ago, and the prospect was dangling like a sweet carrot in front of me, without real dates and details. Then suddenly it was confirmed for a duration of 2 months!! A travel duty in Manila!

I had about a month to get used to the idea, do the necessary paperwork (security training, plane tickets, visas) and prepare the logistics of my absence. Add in the stress of looking like a local, but not knowing the language, not knowing anyone locally and not being able to establish any social circle before landing, and I became a bundle of knots and nerves.

On D-day, I managed not to be too stressed and forgot only my eyeglasses, unwilling to face reality yet. Checking the weather at destination revealed typhoon Karen was about to make its landing and affect the Manila area. Nothing was mentioned at the airport so I blindly trusted the pilot and air controllers and boarded the plane. After an uneventful 5h flight to Doha, I then walked the long shopping corridor of duty-free shops in Doha to board the 8h30 flight to Manila, stuck between 2 big men, one with questionable odor, and the other with a passion reciting religious verses out loud...Luckily there were good movies to distract me from my neighbors.

I was wearing my winter coat in the plane, and it quickly became cumbersome upon landing in Manila. The heat and humidity did not surprise me so much as it was 5PM and the sky was cloudy. After a health control checkpoint (filling in a form and giving it to a lady), the queue through immigration was fast despite being very crowded. I finally realized that my visa stated I would be in the country as 'foreign government official'...not sure I like the sound of that!

With my 2 suitcases, big cabin luggage and winter coat on a trolley, I eagerly exited the airport looking for my taxi booth. I crossed back and forth the road in front of the main exit, looking for the booth, to eventaully find it and able to dry my sweaty t-shirt in the comfort of aircon.

Airport transfer to the hotel had been arranged and paid for. All I needed to do was see a strangely familiar landscape of shacks, traffic jams (on a Sunday afternoon), followed by luxurious high rises. Local colours were added by colourful Jeepneys, and sidecar motorbikes that can rival any rickshaw in other parts of the world. It took about 30-40min drive to the hotel. And I was greeted by a big German shepherd and its handler, sniffing me and my luggage (the dog, not the handler), discharged of all my luggage and accompanied to reception to fill in all the information that one uses on the internet. The young receptionist then guided me to the elevator to bring me to my room and home of the next 2 months. I then realized the common areas, except the lobby, did not have AC.

So when this young man opened the door to the serviced room, a breath of very fresh air welcomed me into a very big 1-bedroom flat (double the size of my rented studio). I was way above ground, too high according to the security recommendation of 2 to 7th floor, but the feeling of height was grand.

I could get used to this..Mabuhay indeed.